“We scientists have found that doing a kindness produces the single most reliable momentary increase in well-being of any exercise we have tested…. Here is the exercise: find one wholly unexpected kind thing to do tomorrow and just do it. Notice what happens to your mood.” (Martin Seligman)
The holiday season can be stressful. It’s a time when another year is hurtling toward its close—often reminding us of unmet goals and the swift passage of time. It’s also a time when expectations and obligations collide with excess, and unless we’ve learned to set reasonable boundaries, stress is often the result.
Multiple recent studies show that one great way to counter stress is to spread some kindness. Research by Elizabeth Raposa, Holly Laws, and Emily Ansell, from the Department of Psychiatry at Yale University’s School of Medicine, showed that when people extend small acts of kindness, such as holding a door, offering assistance, or waving a car into a line of traffic, they experience less stress than on days when they don’t perform these small kindnesses.
The aim isn’t to be the kindest person in the room, it’s to be the kindest version of yourself. Continue reading →
“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” (Meister Eckhart)
It’s all too easy to overlook gratitude as we rush from one meeting or holiday party to the next, one obligation to another, or when we find ourselves mired in dispiriting stories of social inequity and political corruption. Gratitude is a quiet emotion and ours is a very loud world.
But gratitude is the perfect prescription for when we are feeling the stresses of daily life and overwhelmed by the magnitude of ills befalling our planet. That’s the time to take a healthy dose of gratitude.
Think about the side-effects of gratitude:
It opens us to abundance. When we see how much there is to be thankful for, we also see how much we have. Instead of feeling that we need to acquire more material possessions, or that we need to be more than we are, we see that we have enough and we are enough. Continue reading →
There’s a commemorative day, week, or month for nearly everything: iguana awareness, kiwi fruit, be nice to New Jersey, toasted marshmallows (all actual commemoratives). As a rule, I ignore such days, excepting National Ice Cream Cone Day, July 21, because, well . . . ice cream.
One other day I like to observe is coming up soon. World Kindness Day is Wednesday, November 13. Designated as a day on which people worldwide attempt to make the world a better place by celebrating and promoting good deeds and pledging acts of kindness, either as individuals or as organizations.
While I think that should be the goal of every day, since it’s not yet, why not at least celebrate this one day? Mark it on your calendar. Put a reminder on your phone. Start thinking now about how you can spread some kindness in a world where it often seems to be in short supply. Continue reading →
“Our children are the living messages we send to a future we will never see… Will we rob them of their destiny? Will we rob them of their dreams? No – we will not do that.” (Elijah Cummings)
In a week that offered a cornucopia of deceit, corruption, disrespect, and disappointment, many of us found hope and reassurance in—of all places—a funeral.
Congressman Elijah Cummings’ death on October 17 stunned and saddened so many Americans. He was a consistent voice for justice, for equality, and for right action. He was also, as Chair of the House Oversight Committee, a key figure in efforts to protect our democracy. And, as so many eulogizers noted, Congressman Cummings was also a relentlessly kind man.
I was brought to tears by former President Barack Obama’s eulogy—a brief, lovely, and quintessentially Obama speech (oh, how I have missed those!). Continue reading →